Well... it's decided. My trip to Seattle has been cancelled. At the last minute I wasn't able to get a ride. (((

I thought about what I'd type if this happened--I knew it was possible, even probable, but I had fooled myself into actually thinking it would happen. I actually got my parents to say OKAY. But... I thought if it didn't happen, I'd write up here that I was actualy a little relieved; I don't really like making plans, because I don't like being bogged down by commitments and the stress of dealing with them, planning them, and the having to rely on other people, which I absolutely hate doing.

But that isn't how I feel at all.

I didn't really realize how bad this is making me feel--alone in my room with nothing but the glow of my computer in front of me, all I feel is mildly annoyed, and bitter--not towards anyone in particular, but just bitter. A little dissapointed, but angry, if anything. Again, not at anyone. I know you all really did try, and I don't blame any of you, I promise. Just angry at myself, I guess. For thinking something as stupid as me actually being able to go. I should have known better. But then I went upstairs. And I told my dad. And I nearly started crying.

-o- Alright. Well, I'm going to go back to smothering my consciousness in Yu-Gi-Oh! See ya later, guys.

~Atakiri

P>S> Five AMVs going on right now. (Six in a second). Most of them won't make it onto YouTube. Sorry.